Attitude and actions are going to be your most important asset while meeting and dating Colombian girls. I wouldn’t call it game, I would say its more like being confident. A recent comment came up that actually made me think, it’s an important factor. Probably the reason I forget to mention this or even think about mentioning this is because for me at this time the issue is non existent.
While dating so many years in the United States the majority of men learn to be gentlemen. Nothing wrong with being well mannered, polite and all that. However one of those things for some reason or another is to wait for the right moment to make a move. In many cases, myself included in the beginning took more than a few dates to even start to make out or even consider going for the ass. In fact my first gringa girlfriend waited longer than I would like to remember to get into the sack. So in essence we become trained at waiting and in our minds we think this is being proper. There is no reason why you cannot be proper and at the same time make a natural move. This shows that she turns you on, this shows that you are not cold.
I remember a buddy of mine that started to go to Colombia at least once a month. He was a newbie but he was well versed in dating local gringa girls.
He had no problems meeting them in Bogota or Medellin, or finding girls prior trip. So that part was down, the part that he lacked and brought with him was the fact that he waited way to long to make a move sexually. I used to ask him, so how did the night end up. He would say oh pretty good, I would ask him how was she in bed, he would say no, we didn’t bang yet. So I asked did you try?, he said no it was too soon. He would do this even with the girls he had spoken to for a full 1 or 2 weeks prior to flying in. It was obvious that his issue was the fact that he was mentally trained from U.S. standards to even try to make a move on the first date. When we started going on double dates and both of the girls were our first. He learned by observing me. He would be shocked to see me making out with mine across the table so fast. He would be shocked to see us walking hand in hand from the very first moment so fast.
I told him these girls live for affection and love affection like that. While he was sitting there being a proper gentleman he saw me sharing my food with my date by feeding her. After a date like mine, with all the affection, kissing, hand feeding, laughing, there is no way sex is not going to happen. It was just such a huge difference that although difficult to break his old habits, he learned after a while. I am not saying to be a dick about it. You have to just be confident and move in for a hot kiss or throw her a few small kisses first and lead into a long kiss. Or confident enough to grab her hand as soon as you meet her while walking to the cab. They love that and they feel more comfortable with you.
Just trying too hard to be a nice guy. The thing is, those girls he dated and waited in my opinion to long to sleep with probably felt something was wrong with him or he was cold. Or even went as far as thinking, why didn’t he make a move? Am I not sexy enough? It can be difficult to make the transition to dating in another culture. We tend to bring our long term habits with us while thinking they are normal and the girl will respect us more, it’s simply not true. The fact of the matter is those very same women would have had sex with him on the first date if he tried, or if he left that U.S. standards of dating thing home.
It’s different if you try and she says no, or smiles and says not yet (rare). She will not dislike you for trying. In fact for her, it would be very normal that you tried and just by trying more times than not you will succeed if the chemistry is right. In all my years in Colombia, I cannot even remember a time that I tried to kiss a girl and she said no on the first date.
They can sense the confidence and the attitude right off the bat. If you are bringing that perfect gentleman thing with you and you decide to wait, that’s your gig, it has nothing to do with her not wanting to. It’s your mold that you placed on her from the start and she will go with the direction you decide to take. A word of advice is to remember that the time you are not making a move thinking it’s too soon, guy B will be making that move and sleeping with her on that very first night and throughout the trip.
It can be hard when thinking it’s too soon, especially if the girl is smoking hot. We sometimes are just thrilled with the fact that a girl so beautiful is even out with us. So we try too hard to be nice so we don’t lose her. You have to be confident enough to dive in and make a move, it’s never too soon. Life is short and all the bullshit you learned about dating and the standards that some of these American girls throw at us really sucks.
In the new book that comes out next week there is a whole chapter devoted to attitude and confidence if you would like to get more in depth information.