How To Write About Yourself And Not Feel Like A Big Dumb Idiot

Someone sent me this ask and I wasn’t sure if they wanted me to post their name so whatever here it is: “Where do you get the inspiration to write about your everyday life? Like, I love all the things you write, and I would love to be able to also do that, but I always find myself stopping before posting anything publicly. It’s like I have the ideas but not the courage to write it down, because then I think, who would want to read what I have to say? or who would care really?”

Everybody has their own creative process and sources for inspiration, mine just so happens to involve looking at pictures of unclothed men, eating Special K with red berries, dry heaving for approximately 7 to 10 minutes, crying, wet heaving, and then finally mustering the courage to type a sentence into the Internet before collapsing into a pile of spilled coffee and leftover ramen containers.

The truth is, idk where the hell I get inspiration from. I try to follow and read as many funny and creative people as possible, and hope that I’ll absorb even a sliver of their funniness and creativeness and sexiness (if they’re sexy). And, even though I’m terrible at actually following this advice, I try to get away from my computer and go out into the real world (usually to fetch food or alcohol to drag back to my dank lair) and just kinda pay attention to things while I’m out. Most of what I write about, I think, is just the boring details of my life. The trick is to just add a little flavor so it’s not super boring. In my case, I like to keep adding flavor until it’s too flavorful and everybody’s like, “why didn’t you stop adding flavor you could have stopped but you didn’t why are you doing this to us the children are hungry.”

As for whether people will care or want to read…. Who cares? Write for yourself! This was kinda a weird thing for me to accept, too, ‘cause I’ve always found it difficult to just write when you don’t really have an audience. But that’s the only way you can get started. The more you write, the better you’ll get, and the more people will care and want to hear what you have to say.

It’s also helpful, especially while you’re trying to find your voice and find your audience, to try and write about stuff you KNOW other people will care about, especially stuff YOU love and care about, because, chances are, other people like that shit, too. My go-to things (obviously) are boys and butts and Beyoncé, because every person on this planet can agree upon them, and if I find someone that doesn’t, I MAKE them care by physically shoving a beautifully-sculpted ass in their face while I tear my vocal chords screeching “Drunk In Love.” But yeah. The more I wrote about those things, the more confident I felt in my own dumb writing and joke-making and Twittering, and I was able to cross over and start writing about myself more.

So don’t hold back! WRITE A WHOLE GODDAMN BOOK. CHUG AN ENTIRE GALLON OF WHOLE MILK. HUG A HOT STRANGER. EAT A SLEEVE OF OREOS IN ONE SITTING. UNLEASH YOUR INNER SPIRIT.